# People Pleasing Statistics 2026

*34 Numbers, Every One With Its Source.*

> 34 numbers on people pleasing, anxious attachment and the habits around them, every one linked to its study, thread or tool with a date. Quote them with the source.

Canonical: https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics  
Published: 22 September 2026  
Last updated: 26 October 2026  
By Glissa

Every number on this page links to the study, the thread or the tool it came from, with a date. Quote them. The source is the point.

![A woman at a desk by a window in the evening, a pen in her hand, looking with mild surprise at an open notebook full of tally marks and circled numbers](https://glissa.io/assets/blog/the-tally-notebook.webp)

## 10 numbers to quote, each with the study behind it

If you quote only 10, quote these. Each links to its source further down.

- **About 1 in 5 adults picked the anxious paragraph when asked to describe themselves in love** 620 readers of a Denver newspaper, 1987. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-hazan)
- **A quarter picked the avoidant one** Same survey, same 620 readers. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-hazan)
- **Strangers said yes to a request about twice as often as the person asking had predicted** A series of studies asking strangers, 2008. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-flynn)
- **A move decided in advance gets made: 94 studies, 8,461 people, a medium-to-large effect** The meta-analysis on if-then plans, 2006. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-gollwitzer)
- **Measuring a breakup weekly for 9 weeks sped up the recovery** 210 people, 2015. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-larson)
- **6.1% still open the median mood tracker app on day 30** Retention across mental health apps, 2019. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-baumel)
- **130,012 people tapped the heart on one comment about leaving before you can be left** The most-hearted of about 1,540 comments and reviews counted in September 2026. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-dig)
- **27,100 searches a month for anxious attachment** Semrush, US, September 2026. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-search)
- **1,600 searches a month for how to stop being a people pleaser, and 1,300 more for how to stop people pleasing** Semrush, US, September 2026. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-search)
- **30,490 people hearted a comment that read, in full, damn I am the breadcrumber** Under a breadcrumbing video, September 2026. [Source](https://glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics#st-dig)

![Woman in profile seeing her reflection in a train window, one hand paused mid-gesture](https://glissa.io/assets/blog/catching-herself.webp)

*Number 3, in a kitchen. The no she is bracing for mostly does not come.*

## Studies put numbers on the habit long before the internet named it

Each entry names the paper and links to its DOI. Where a study measured something adjacent to people pleasing, the entry says what it measured, and nothing more.

- **620 readers of a Denver newspaper answered a survey on love in 1987, and it named the 3 attachment styles adults still use** [Hazan and Shaver, 1987](https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.52.3.511)
- **Roughly 1 in 5 of them picked the anxious paragraph: wanting to merge completely, and worrying the other person did not really want them** Same paper.
- **A quarter picked the avoidant paragraph: uncomfortable close to others, with a pull away when someone gets near** Same paper.
- **The pattern had a clinical name in 1977: anxious attachment, in a paper on the making and breaking of affectional bonds** [Bowlby, 1977](https://doi.org/10.1192/bjp.130.3.201)
- **Askers guessed how many strangers would agree to help, and underestimated by roughly half** [Flynn and Lake, 2008](https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.95.1.128)
- **Across 94 studies and 8,461 people, a plan that named the moment and the move together had a medium-to-large effect on follow-through** [Gollwitzer and Sheeran, 2006](https://doi.org/10.1016/S0065-2601(06)38002-1)
- **Writing down what you do shifts the behaviour on its own, in the direction you want, and unreliably** [Korotitsch and Nelson-Gray on self-monitoring, 1999](https://doi.org/10.1037/1040-3590.11.4.415)
- **6 researchers at UCLA went back through the stress literature in 2000 and found fight-or-flight had been drawn mostly from males; under threat, females more often tend and befriend** [Taylor and colleagues, 2000](https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-295X.107.3.411)
- **Among 626 adults aged 18 to 40, the ones who had been breadcrumbed reported less satisfaction with life and more loneliness than the ones who had not** [Navarro and colleagues, 2020](https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph17031116)
- **Closeness has been measured since 1992 as 7 pairs of overlapping circles, from barely touching to almost one** [Aron, 1992](https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.63.4.596)
- **Across 3 studies, the more of themselves people had folded into a couple, the less clearly they could say who they were after it ended, and that blur tracked the distress** [Slotter, 2010](https://doi.org/10.1177/0146167209352250)
- **Those who anxiously expect rejection read it into small things and react, and their partners grow less satisfied and more likely to leave** [Downey and Feldman, 1996](https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.70.6.1327)
- **Of 155 people fresh out of a relationship, the ones leaving one that gave them little reported the most growth and the most positive emotion** [Lewandowski and Bizzoco, 2007](https://doi.org/10.1080/17439760601069234)
- **210 people were split in 2 after a breakup; the half that answered questions about it repeatedly over 9 weeks came out with a clearer sense of self and less loneliness** [Larson and Sbarra, 2015](https://doi.org/10.1177/1948550614563085)
- **6.1% of people who opened the median mood tracker app on day 1 still opened it on day 30, and mental health apps in general kept very few past a month** [Baumel and colleagues, 2019](https://doi.org/10.2196/14567)

**Find the habit behind your own yes**

Answer a few questions about your last few weeks. You learn which habit shows up most in them, and you get one dare to try.

## She said it herself, in comments counted on the day

Between 16 and 20 September 2026 we read roughly 1,540 public comments and reviews by women describing 11 habits, across TikTok and Reddit, plus Goodreads and the App Store. These are the lines the most people agreed with, with the count on the day.

- **130,012 hearts on one TikTok comment: she has commitment issues, and once someone convinces her to trust them she has abandonment issues instead** The largest single line across the 11 habits. Pattern: pushing people away.
- **66,579 hearts on the line about being the one nobody has to worry about** Pattern: hyper-independence.
- **30,490 hearts on a comment under a breadcrumbing video that read, in full, damn I am the breadcrumber** On the first page of 50 comments, 9 said they were the breadcrumber and 8 said they had been breadcrumbed.
- **4,922 hearts on the line about saying no to a glass of water you wanted** Pattern: people pleasing, the fawn response.
- **372 upvotes on a 35-year-old asking why 2 dates were so hard to get over, and 242 on the answer: you fall for the idea, not the person** A dating forum for over-30s. Pattern: accepting breadcrumbs.
- **324 likes on a book review saying she exercises and eats well only in the weeks her partner is away** Pattern: losing yourself.
- **314 hearts on a comment describing a note on her phone of things she remembers she likes, which she said felt like getting her personality back** The fix the most women agreed with for losing yourself.
- **11 habits, one page each, and a 12th line that came up under all of them: I know what I am doing and I do it anyway** Pattern: all 11.

![Woman standing at a window with her arms folded, her phone lying face down on the sill beside her](https://glissa.io/assets/blog/watching-not-acting.webp)

*Number 8. Knowing, and watching herself do it anyway.*

## What she types into Google, in searches a month

Monthly US search volumes from Semrush, read on 20 September 2026. Each term links to the page that answers it.

- **27,100 searches a month: anxious attachment** Largest term in the set by a distance. [The page](https://glissa.io/blog/anxious-attachment-when-he-doesnt-text-back).
- **5,400: hyper independence, and 1,600 more for hyper independent** [The page](https://glissa.io/blog/is-hyper-independence-a-trauma-response).
- **1,600: how to stop being a people pleaser** [The page](https://glissa.io/blog/how-to-stop-being-a-people-pleaser).
- **1,300: how to stop people pleasing** Same page as above.
- **1,300: how to stop caring what people think** [The page](https://glissa.io/blog/how-to-stop-caring-what-people-think).
- **720: how to get over a situationship** [The page](https://glissa.io/blog/how-to-get-over-a-situationship).
- **590: why do I push people away, and 590 again for how to find yourself again** [One page](https://glissa.io/blog/why-do-i-push-people-away) and [the other](https://glissa.io/blog/how-to-find-yourself-again).
- **320: shadow work app** No page yet.
- **170: anxious attachment quiz, and 110 for people pleaser test** [One quiz](https://glissa.io/quiz/anxious-attachment) and [the other](https://glissa.io/quiz/am-i-a-people-pleaser).

## Where the apps stand, by the one retention study that counted

2 facts about apps, one of them about Glissa.

- **You spend 30 seconds a day in Glissa, and get one small dare a week** An inner glow up for women: you drop the 11 patterns that make you shrink, people pleasing among them. $4.99 a month, billed as $59.99 a year, iPhone only, live on the App Store since 22 September 2026.
- **Almost everyone leaves a mental health app inside a month** Baumel and colleagues, 2019, entry 15 above.

**Put your own week beside these numbers**

Every count above belongs to other women. Find out which of the 11 patterns takes the most of you, and start with this week’s dare.

## Questions

**Can I use these numbers?**

Yes, with the source. Every study entry carries its DOI, every search figure its tool and date, every comment its platform and count on the day. Quote the number and link the paper, or link this page and it does that for you.

**Why is an app publishing statistics?**

Because every post here rests on these numbers. One page with every source is easier to check than the same numbers repeated in 9 posts.

**How often is this updated?**

The studies do not change. Every search figure and comment count carries the date it was read, so you can see how fresh it is.

## How to cite this page

Glissa, People Pleasing Statistics 2026, glissa.io/blog/people-pleasing-statistics, read on the date you read it. For any single number, cite the study named beside it, because we are only the index.

If you want a number of your own, you can see how much of you is showing in Glissa. It takes 30 seconds a day on an iPhone, and each week brings one dare written from your answers. If it reads you wrong, tell us.

## The glow up that starts on the inside

Get back the parts of you that you filed down to keep everyone else comfortable. 30 seconds a day, all the way back to 100% and past it.

$4.99 a month, billed as $59.99 a year